Breakdowns to Breakthroughs…

I spent the past 4 days surrounded by a loving and beautiful group of ‘strangers’ soaking up the richness of a Yoga Immersion based on the Universal Principles of Alignment (the foundations of Anusara Yoga).  What unraveled over the extend-o-weekend was so much more than nitty gritty alignment.  Which, I suppose, was my big question going into the whole shamazzle:  How does one unlock a spiritual connection from the heart through something as technical and ‘heady’ (not heart-y) as alignment? Yech!   While I don’t think I’ve got my melon completely wrapped around that one just yet, here’s what I learned.

  • Breakdowns are a prerequisite to breakthroughs.  Though we might fear the darkness that they cast upon us in the moment, their purpose is inevitably to elevate us to a new way of being.  A lighter path.  An a-ha.  It’s almost as though those of us who are blessed and courageous enough to allow ourselves to breakdown are rewarded by moving through the lesson, to absorb the wisdom and be heightened on to the next stretch in their meandering path.  The theme for our unraveling is unquestionably:  The Obstacle is the Opportunity.
  • It all doesn’t have to make sense straight away.  The principles I learned this weekend completely turned my world upside down.  Everything I thought I knew was stacked in neatly colour coded Lego towers.  Then, on day two – the earth started shaking, my foundation lost it’s stability, and the whole lot came crashing down.  (Some yoga nerds might argue the towers didn’t have quite enough ankle loop or pada bandha to support them.)  And so, I sat in the rubble, knee deep in Lego, tears streaming down my face, confused and ashamed of all the things I didn’t even know I didn’t know (hello – blindspot.)  Day by day – a new foundation was laid.  Physical experiences with the process led to emotional shifts.  Nothing necessarily ‘landed’ in my brain and as much as all the synapses continued to retry endless combinations, things are still waiting to line up just-so upstairs.  Matters of the heart cannot always be understood by the head.  We spend our days and often our nights tossing and turning, wracking our brains to understand our purpose, our ‘dharma’.  We crave to understand how it all works.  Oh what we’d give to have someone turn the light’s on in the darkness of the Universe so we could see the infinite abundance of possibilities that connect us all.  Oh, the peace of mind that would rest in our heads could we finally create a mental construct or schema in our mind to make it all make ‘sense.’  The Universe knows no logic.  Logic is a matter of the head not the heart.  For us to think our little ‘pea’ brains could outsmart the Universe, well, let’s just say she’s just looking down on us from above, with so much love, thinking “Oh Darlings…”
  • You’re not supposed to figure it out.  It doesn’t matter how much time you spend worrying about the future, it always turns out alright in the end.  You’ll just ruin your experience of it in the meantime worrying so much.  You are in control of your experience.  You’re not alone.  As unique as we are as individuals, we’re all the same.  Our struggles are shared.  “Everyone feels like everyone else, just not at the same time.” Nothing is accomplished by over-thinking.  Everything is calm and connected when we lift each other up and allow ourselves to be uplifted.    It’s all good.  All of it.  Even the stuff that doesn’t seem to at the time, will line up in divine perfect harmony by the end.  Trust, exhale, and smile.

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